Wake up. Time for some fast food breakfast. My morning show is on. Oh cool, I love this movie...I've seen it dozens of times, but what the hell. Soda refill. I just love this fluoridated toothpaste. The water faucet will always give me water. Leave those lights on, it might get dim in here. Snack time...I cant pronounce any ingredients in this snack but boy it sure is delicious. My other show is coming on. Damn, my $300 cell phone is so outdated. Better check my wall. I saw these shoes on the red carpet last night. Those depression symptoms sound familiar, I better call for my free trial. I think they are right, I really need a bigger penis. Soda refill. Ooh, a $10 coffee sounds delicious. EBT accepted here. These chemicals really do what they say...for my hair, for my face, for my skin, for my eyes, for my teeth. Ooh, my show is on! News, sorry don't watch it, its too depressing. I've waited all year for the Super Bowl! Pizza delivery...awesome...I would go myself but I get so winded walking out to the car, besides my other show just started. Update wall. Mom, go get me another 2 liter please. Why talk?...just text! Smokes, beer, chips, and a drink refill....Vision cards are the best and they are free! Is Dancing with the Stars on tonite? Time to take my prescriptions, I am very sick you know. I better call in my unemployment claim. You have to change oil in a car? Really? I am sure glad that the police are here to protect me. It's not my fault I'm overweight, I have a condition. Don't get any cheese puff cheese on the new handicap parking sticker. American Idol is such a good show. Time for a pill and a refill. Gardening is so lame...who needs that boring junk? My loved ones know I love them, even though I don't say it to them anymore, don't need to, they know I do. 10 more minutes until my favorite show! Check wall. Is it the first of the month yet? I need to go shopping. Super size all of the value meals please.....my kids won't go to bed hungry. He said he did his homework, my child doesn't lie. This is an election year? No shit? My mailbox is to damn far. Refill. The game is on tonite! Outside?..no thanks, it is too bright out there. My doctor said so. Maybe I should get lip injections to look sexy, or boobs, or a butt, maybe a new face. My local news is the best. I can't be in sunlight when I take these pills, but it's okay, I am getting better. Refill.....healthier choice this time.....root beer....no caffeine. Oh just let the dog clean off your plate. It's the Republicans fault! I have 20 people living within a 200 yard radius of me...naw, I don't need to know their names. Being neighborly is so old school. It's the Democrats fault! The mainstream media wouldn't lie!
Get your flu shot today! This pretty blue pill helps me get fast asleep! Energy drinks are so good and good for you! Mom, what is the pledge of allegiance? It's for the children. Don't they realize its Global Warming? Geez. I am so glad that my government cares for me and is looking out for my best interests. Only whites are racists. What do you mean...read you a bed time story? Isn't everything just wonderful? Spending my time on all of these important things during the day sure makes me tired.
Sunday, January 29, 2012
Sunday, January 22, 2012
Amazon twins and the Asian sensation
Last night was spent celebrating the birthday of my beautiful girlfriend Connie and her twin sister Tina.
When one thinks of celebrating a birthday...images of birthday cake, confetti, singing and the opening of gifts may come to mind, but this was a different type of evening. How times have changed. None of the before mentioned b-day related things were present last night....except for one small gift wrapped in newspaper. Maybe it is true...the older you get, the less birthdays matter and the less they are celebrated. Personally I would have loved to take everyone out for a fun, wild night on the town. But, being that most of us are broke as hell we settled for option B. We spent the evening together in the family bar...eating a small dinner and having a few cocktails.
The twins looked great. Standing nearly 6' without the death heels worn by both last night, they towered over me even more than usual......and the rest of us there for that matter...lol. Both wore cute, sexy outfits which I believe produced drool from the 2 or 3 old men regulars sitting at the dark corner of the bar. I don't think they blinked the whole time they were there lol. We had decided to get ready to go when the doors buzzer sounded. In walks one of the twins' girlfriends....Kelly Wong. Kelly, who has been a best friend of the twins since they were in grade school, is also a beautiful woman who also stands nearly 6'. She was really the only one of the invites that showed up. The girls sat, visited and drank for a couple of hours while us guys more or less kept at our end of the table and bullshitted with one another about....you guessed it....bullshit.
All in all it was nice just to get to visit, have some food and some drinks with a few friends for the girls b-day.
Standing up to give hugs before leaving, again I was visually reminded of the long legged beauties that surrounded me and my male counterparts. The moral of this story is......if you are sitting in a bar somewhere and the feeling of being shadowed comes upon you along with the involuntary drip that develops at the mouth BEWARE!....the hot babe trio of the Amazon Twins and the Asian Sensation are close by!
When one thinks of celebrating a birthday...images of birthday cake, confetti, singing and the opening of gifts may come to mind, but this was a different type of evening. How times have changed. None of the before mentioned b-day related things were present last night....except for one small gift wrapped in newspaper. Maybe it is true...the older you get, the less birthdays matter and the less they are celebrated. Personally I would have loved to take everyone out for a fun, wild night on the town. But, being that most of us are broke as hell we settled for option B. We spent the evening together in the family bar...eating a small dinner and having a few cocktails.
The twins looked great. Standing nearly 6' without the death heels worn by both last night, they towered over me even more than usual......and the rest of us there for that matter...lol. Both wore cute, sexy outfits which I believe produced drool from the 2 or 3 old men regulars sitting at the dark corner of the bar. I don't think they blinked the whole time they were there lol. We had decided to get ready to go when the doors buzzer sounded. In walks one of the twins' girlfriends....Kelly Wong. Kelly, who has been a best friend of the twins since they were in grade school, is also a beautiful woman who also stands nearly 6'. She was really the only one of the invites that showed up. The girls sat, visited and drank for a couple of hours while us guys more or less kept at our end of the table and bullshitted with one another about....you guessed it....bullshit.
All in all it was nice just to get to visit, have some food and some drinks with a few friends for the girls b-day.
Standing up to give hugs before leaving, again I was visually reminded of the long legged beauties that surrounded me and my male counterparts. The moral of this story is......if you are sitting in a bar somewhere and the feeling of being shadowed comes upon you along with the involuntary drip that develops at the mouth BEWARE!....the hot babe trio of the Amazon Twins and the Asian Sensation are close by!
Saturday, January 14, 2012
Stop and smell.........the coffee
There is nothing like a good hot cup of coffee on a cold Saturday morning.
This morning was like the old cartoons I used to watch as a kid. Some hypnotic odor, pleasant or putrid, would linger up to whoever and take the form of a hand or finger and drawn them to it's origin by their nostrils. Hopefully, it is a freshly baked apple pie sitting on the window sill cooling. :) In my case this morning, it was the first pot of today's hot brewing coffee.
I won't even go into the mandatory, delicious first cigarette of the morning that goes with that coffee. :)
This morning was like the old cartoons I used to watch as a kid. Some hypnotic odor, pleasant or putrid, would linger up to whoever and take the form of a hand or finger and drawn them to it's origin by their nostrils. Hopefully, it is a freshly baked apple pie sitting on the window sill cooling. :) In my case this morning, it was the first pot of today's hot brewing coffee.
I won't even go into the mandatory, delicious first cigarette of the morning that goes with that coffee. :)
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